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My First Voice Channel |
Used to the concept and flow of automatic writing I was unaware that there were stronger energies and other mediums for using them. Aiddrienne had talked and written about it but I was not really paying attention, it was still a game in my head to me. The reality was far more powerful. This was soon illustrated when a member of the circle channeled. To think let alone witness someone speaking the words of a guide was mind blowing. The energy in the room changed, there could be no question of proof being needed, I was hearing the thoughts of something I could not see or easily comprehend. Of course, this prompted me to think about channeling. If I could write the words of a guide then why not speak then instead. Again I had been told about this but I was not listening preferring to keep my guide a secret, it scared me. If I owned up to it myself then I would have to own up to it with others. I did not want to have to believe what I knew to be true.
As always things never go the way you envisage them. I had talked about verbal channeling with Aiddrienne and with Alan, each time it came up my fear welled up inside. That horrible knowing fear that you realize something is inevitable. So one Friday night at circle it happened. Surprisingly I was still very skeptical of all these new experiences and wondered whether it was just a theatrical trick done for effect. The reality proved me wrong.
The form taken at circle at that time was a guided meditation then we would be brought back and discuss what things we had visualized. Sometimes we would be asked to get something for someone else, a gift or inspirational words. On returning from our meditative state, Alan would ask each person in turn what had happened and what it had meant for them. The accuracy of these gifts and thoughts was astounding. Very often situations in peoples lives would be described with astounding detail and then followed with a possible action to be taken. This had helped me immensely with my spiritual and physical growth. On this particular Friday when we were called back to the circle, I found that my head could not swivel that only my eyes moved. The whole of my body was stiff. I was panicking, my heart was racing, what the hell was going on? I asked for guidance from Aiddrienne who told me not to worry, that I was safe.
My mind began to go over things I had been told in the meditation but nothing was clear, a fog had come over me. What was I going to say? Could anyone tell I was acting strange? Deciding that I was not going to go any further, I tried to smile at others in the circle when they had any message for me but I could not. Having read somewhere that if you cross your legs and arms the channel is blocked or at least weakened I crossed everything it was possible to cross. Still to no avail, and Alan was soon to ask me whether I had anything for the circle. Blind panic managed to convince me that nothing was going to happen. Then Alan said those words I will never forget. "Phil, have you got anything to say?"
I went to say something but nothing came out, I felt myself being lifted up some where, I was fighting it. Then Alan said in a very calm voice "Uncross your legs and take it slowly, you are quite safe." I did as I was told. Images flooded into my mind. What do I do now? "Easy just open your mouth and we will do the rest" I heard somewhere in my head. I did what I was told, coughing loudly words spewed from me. I was aware of what I had to say, scenes were shown to me and I had to relay them. Hearing myself talk but not remembering what had been said was the confirmation that this was coming from some other source. It seemed to come to an end, my body relaxed and slowly my senses came back to me. Opening my eyes I was surprised to see everyone still sat in the circle. Where ever I had been it was not in this room. As if to verify that a strange had occurred the girl next to me touch my hand to congratulate me. A pain shot up my arm. We had been told on numerous occasions that to touch someone in trance or coming out of one could be physically dangerous. This I thought to be another one of those theatrical devices, that pain was no illusion. Incredible I had channeled. The content was not important to me the experience was everything. Predictably, soon after there was an important channel from the guide who had first wrote in my book.
We have come through as a channel now and the process has begun. You are aware of some of the tasks set out before you, we are with you, also as you do not need a name we will give you several to choose from. Abracticus, Meldonia, Martin, Geoff or you may use our preferred name which is Morgan or Morgana. Either gender is applicable we are a body of guides and you may call upon any of us. Things change constantly and we are waiting to be manifest within your presence. Many guides will come through from here, each one has his or her own specialty and you will meet with all of them. Our actual forms will appear to you from time to time. We appreciate you persist in personal relationships but you must be careful not to disguise or elaborate. You will get to know us all but it is unimportant save for the knowledge of us and to recognize that we are there when we come through. Aiddrienne is always there and is constantly with you she is a good woman loves you immensely in all our talking infinitives are pointless because you have no meaning of infinity only a word just trust us to portray the words that are going to have the desired effect. You are a very really real down to earth person and because of this you may or can have us down with you speaking in your terms. We know that it is important for our language to be understood and each person chosen can ally with different people so that no words are wasted. This is all we have to say on this subject names and manifestations are needed if the person desires them for growth, ease of learning or understanding or for preference we are with you. Sometimes we will talk to you as a body. I know you find this hard to understand but there may be any number of guides talking to you as one at any given time. They will all become friends and companions when there are tasks to be done and communications to be made. We are around you and will come through but Aiddrienne is your partner, as you will. That withstanding she is yours and you and her are together for life. Your relationship is both your realities, infinity could be used here, and you will learn to understand these words, but she and you are together cannot be separated you are for eachothers growth and to fulfill the everyday life tasks. As well as your guide and partner and life friend. She will help in all you do because you are inseparable, all your life tasks and goals have become hers, this was done by choice and is better for that fact. So try to realize she is always there, trust her and in time you will learn to be with her and live together as one body. She is not taking you over nor you her, she is just there and will remain, it is a good comprehensive study. You have done well and as time grows you will trust her and you will decide things together and complete the tasks. We love you both and are glad you have chosen the path together and independently from each other. We are pleased to see the trust you have for her trust and love and be obsequient to her and together you have always the knowledge that she loves you. And as now will protect you and assist and be your partner to look after you in all physical manifestations as you have done and as you have trusted her to do however bizarre, she will be trusted with you and you will trust her. We are pleased to see that you realized it is us and have not allowed too much ego. We are aware that this can be hard but as you talk to Aiddrienne so you will talk to us. This too is a relationship and when understood can be relaxed. You need to trust us for we come from a high plane and so long as we are in communication we will be with you, you will have to let go more but this will come with time and growth probably sooner than later. Your conversations with u on your own are easier because you let go and have less fear, we understand but growing in confidence and trust we will be able to use you as a body as you yourself use yours. At these times Aiddrienne will protect you, she knows how you feel and what you need and will do what is necessary when it is necessary. At this time you will both be together in spirit and you and her will be on the same plane as sometimes you are now. Do nit be afraid we will nit harm your body we just borrow it. In trance you are safe only when you are in circle we cannot or will not do anything else at present. You will be safe so you can let go. If you feel yourself being pulled up, it is Aiddrienne taking you so that we can come through. It will be hard to start for you naturally have an attachment to your body, but as you know by your experience your spirit lives not your body. We must stress that all the power and love given between you is important. The experienced ones amongst you are capable of knowing and acting accordingly with correct degree of responsibility for the circle and each individual within the family. Family is used as the whole body is likened to such and love is the bond. Remember this is not a game you have come through and there is work to be done and all things will come to pass. But as members of the group are aware and know they gave a responsibility to protect and look after each other the trust that remains will grow it is the nature that trust abundant, love and giving to a body the support they need is as well. You must all remain open, verify and question and absorb everyone is for the same universal light all over the world and universe. We can invasive most. Remember you must not question other peoples reality or grasp of a situation, grounding and intelligent thought is necessary, you all know this to be true. There can be no growth without trust and allowing the process to unfold, allow things to happen and if not understood now it will be. You take this seriously and are glad to see this. Each one has a task and goal the first of which is to take the task and find it, it is part of spiritual development. Sometimes it takes years or months to ascertain small fragments of the goal, but as time and learning are made so the goals are made more apparent. Do not worry when you need to see a part of the goal or task for growth you will. After a period of absorption and study (we use study in a general sense, as all life is study and realization) you will see. We do not reveal things until they are earned and ready, indeed until you are ready and have climbed high enough, then you cannot see them. As with the analogy with the earths curvature, the higher you get the more you can see. A word about analogies, they are used and are useful for ease of understanding but are wildly imperfect so when they are used they must not be taken out of context as arent visions or gifts. Being open there should not be a problem, as is stated you must remain open and flexible at all times. You cannot stray too far we are here to help you and in so doing we are connecting and showing and sharing and learning. You only know what is needed to be known at a given time to stop confusion and not to overload. Some of you have less capacity for confusion than others. There is no right or wrong in this for different bodies grasp and absorb more than others but remember you are all equal and each has a specific task and goal and are enjoying the same quest and are on the same path like everyone has blood. This is the last analogy; they have boundaries and as such are useless for serious study and development. There are many good times to be had and links to be made and humor. We understand and have all emotions, so are capable of having and using them. Humor and knowledge and the path go together well they promote balance. Remember we are all in this and as such we enjoy and will enjoy and love and good wishes and be free we have our goals and tasks to attain this. There is no need to know more and spontaneously you will know when necessary our love to everyone. Morgan.
Earlier the phrase earning and learning popped into one of our discussions Earning and learning. Nothing is ever just given. It must be earned. When it has been learnt then and only then may it be given, it became the favorite that sometimes I hated or loved but always understood, I used to say "Yes Aiddrienne, three bags full Aiddrienne." Then wed have a big discussion on being intent on the chosen path and how important it was to understand what was being told to me, responsibility and so on. I was a trial to her at times. A funny thing was that I only had to be told once. I did take it seriously so I did learn. I learned absolute trust with her. Sometimes that could be a bit frightening, especially when the tests were physical. Most of the time in hindsight I would not have been harmed, whatever happened it was my perception of what might happen that produced the fear I had to get over. It was always stressed that the decision was always mine I had to take responsibility for it. No good saying some imaginary person told me to do it I must be in control. This seemed to stop me becoming unstable and careless or going completely barking mad. I am sure some would say I did go barking mad.
A lot of very strange but interesting concepts can out during our discussions. Some seemed to be just bending the rules and getting me to look at things from a different almost surreal perspective. Altering the concept of time was a favorite theme. Living in our time it is hard to think of the future and past being reversed but can give some interesting slants on a situation. Here is one of those time things as taught and learned during one of our teacher pupil sessions.
11/3/90
Yes another dream dawns. That is confirmation you have been storing these experiences to come forward at the correct time. We do sneak in the odd prediction but usually are not known as predictors until the prediction has materialized of course any other way would be silly, and would not aid. I know you know but again these are the same nothing is given unless earned things are given when learnt and I would add that things are given when not earned to be stored and used when learned. Any other way and your minds would have to take in so much in verify so much in one go that it would take years to catch up, so things are leached in before. If you like verification is given before verification becomes necessary, its like giving the answer before the question or selling on the stock market before buying. You may do well to study the stock market. Think about it. I will say no more. But you have learned that this will be important being able to look at things backwards or through the mirror or if you like an interesting concept good you had to think about that. This is you learning, you must understand I cannot give you things you must understand them because people will ask you. If you havent got inside the ideas and concepts you cannot converse intellectually with authority and confidence and with knowledge. For people must believe you not me. Do you understand? YES. Good, now the concepts please Phil. Take your time think and write the answer. You have it you just have to materialize it. Yes you are studying now concentrate and give me the answer to the question. I am prompting you, show the answer please it must me in words you understand and can relay. The answer please.
The answer.
The effect is there before the cause of the effect. To clarify and to make more sense in the way things happen, for ease of information input and to cut down on wasted time in learning things already known previously, the reverse is apparently true. The effect is given before the cause is realized and for a backward realization. In other words a realization in reverse so you have the answer before the question arises. The effect is there before the cause of the effect is materialized.
I understand that and see that answers can be given when ignorance is there because without the question we wont know what the answer is going to look like. So time is speeded up and we can be worked on when we are asleep, not physically but spiritually. This happens on all levels as you grow. The effect and answers are given before the cause or questions as a tool that is used in previous lives. If this were not done then in each life everything would have to be learned again. We would wander around like zombies because of the overpowering growth and input. It also applies to the course of any specific life.
This small concept battered its way around my little head until I realized the full meaning of it. Reading it through I was gripped with this horrible feeling that everything was controlled that there was no freedom of choice or self will in all this. We were destined to do whatever had been planned for us. Not a very appealing notion for a free spirit. This might have been true if everything fell in order and we were aware of the outcome. They do not however do this. The dawnings only come when all the right pieces come together; they can come in any order and at any time. We can only concentrate on one situation consciously at one time on our physical journey. Spiritually we can cope with many different situations at many different levels at the same time. These aid us in our physical progression through time. We know we are on the right track when our spiritual consciousness affirms the stages of our incarnation on this planet. We are self-verifying.
Humor took up a great part of the chatter between Aiddrienne and me. I found it a great way of learning and a way of not taking myself too seriously. Things got a bit silly at times. She once asked me that if she told me to eat shit would I do it. I replied that I would. She said I was stupid and should have more brains. I felt a little hurt at this and so followed a large lesson on responsibility of actions, validation and using our own abilities to work things out when something appears to be wrong. Blind faith at times is a very dangerous thing. So how was I supposed to know when she was joking and when I had to trust her completely? Learn to understand the feelings and energies around you learn to see the different energies when there are important things to be said and done and above all lighten up. Was the reply.
Never had I thought that things would lead me into such a way of thinking or such a weird situation. All I was doing was picking up where I had left off from the angels. Learning became fun, life had an interest and I started to trust a woman again. This may only have been in spirit but it was a start. As I was always being told - nothing happens by chance and belief is every thing.
With these weird goings on and new lessons to be learnt I still had no idea where it was leading me or why? At times, I would just try to forget it all pretending that all was an illusion, and that nothing had really gone on. Thinking that it was just a way for the mind to heal itself after a run of bad luck. The whole idea was bazaar but my life had inextricable changed nothing would be the same again.
The question of the dark side always popped up now and then. Was I meddling in something black and nasty? The answer to that was quite simple and easy to work out. For the first time in years I had started to read the Bible, finding a new way to interpret many well known and loved passages. I was particularly fond of the prophets of the Old Testament. If dark things were afoot surely the Bible, a huge wealth of knowledge handed down for centuries was the last place to find my wandering mind. At last God made more sense now, not a dogma dreamt up to control people or serve greedy kings and governments, but a reference point. If the Bible had been written in todays world Im sure that it would have been hailed as a great piece of channeling, not the strict straight jacket of does and donts that it sometimes appears to be. The freedom that trust gives you is beautiful. The documentation of my relationships had begun and I had found a spirituality that I thought never existed. My earlier internal conflict seemed to have ironed itself out now, as always I was looking too hard. I also had to live in this reality, this reality being my own personal one; I had to be comfortable with myself, no one else to start with. After that I would have to stand up and be counted for my beliefs, if I did not understand them then they would be seen as an empty shell and I would become insular and begin to live a lie. Not being able to talk about my beliefs would mean that they were in reality nothing more than a facade. I had gone through enough of those to be able to recognize them so I would have to be hard and totally honest with others and myself. That I knew would be one of the biggest tests. No good hiding your light under a bushel. If my experiences were in truth then they would be seen as such I must live or die by them if they were to have real meaning.
© Phil Ironside